Category Archives: Armpit Sweat Stains

Amy Winehouse Alien Armpit and Excessively Sweaty Boyfriend

Kill it with fire!  Nuke it from orbit!  Amy Winehouse’s no sweat armpit has an alien protrusion!  We think it could be the antichrist.  Hide the children. What is that thing?  Is it sentient? Is it a drug stash?  Amy Winehouse who’s infamous for her off-stage pursuits, and famous for her on stage sweaty performances, is just [...]
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Jude Law as Hamlet: To Sweat or Not to Sweat

To wear antiperspirant or not to wear antiperspirant. These are troubling times indeed, excessively sweaty Jude Law. Back in December of 2009, a wee actor named Jude Law was doing Hamlet on Broadway, while his movie Sherlock Holmes was to debut a month or so later and he was set to have another child. [...]
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Chubby Mariah Carey Sweating into Obscurity Finally

Where have all the Cinderella’s gone?  Cinderella’s story ended early (you never got to find out what happened after the Prince marries Cinderella), and if they made sequels, the story would probably end up like mimicking Mariah Carey’s life.  For realz dawg.  Sweat life.  Sweat life. What really is sweaty Mariah Carey’s appeal?  Sure, great voice, [...]
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Desperate Teri Hatcher Sweating: Sweat-Stained Cougar Action

Sweaty cougar roar! Former NFL cheerleader, and currently a desperate housewife, a role suited for sweaty Teri Hatcher, as art copies real life, is found excessive sweating her way out of the sexy-face.  If you’re going to make a sexy-face, make sure your fluids, especially your sweat, are contained, just say’n. We’re not haters, actually, sometimes we [...]
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Scarlett Johansson Stops the Press with Excessive Perspiration

Sweaty Scarlett Johansson shows that it’s a lot of hard work being almost perfect, sometimes you leak out some  excessive perspiration…  What’s a politically active and sex symbol to do?  Antiperspirant? “I would like to say among celebrities, their needs to be some sort of antiperspirant relief fund” We couldn’t agree more Mrs. Reynolds (Scarlett Johansson married [...]
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Alec Baldwin: Sweating Enough for All Baldwins Everywhere

We have the love for excessive sweating Alec Baldwin.  Who wouldn’t?  Great sweaty actor with huge range and real emotion, who also is politically active in an honest, well-thought-out way.  We even love the excessive sweating Alec Baldwin, 30 Rock?  Amazing. “Hey Buddy, see this water bottle?  Yeah, in two seconds it’s gonna be on my [...]
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Hilary Swank Cyborg Excessive Sweating

Is excessively perspiring Hilary Swank looking like a cyborg ambassador for the upcoming human-robot war below?  Yes, and we’re not sure if it’s a good look… “Fierce” isn’t quite the the right word, attractively menacing?  Is she looking for John Conner? Link or Bookmark to: Hide Sites
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Ashton Kutcher Sweating the Jungle: Watch Out for Cougars!

Giant pink, excessive sweating, goofy man spotted in wild.  Approach with caution and beware of cougar nearby… Ashton Kutcher isn’t just the sweaty victim of a cougar mauling, he’s also starring in the new movie, Valentine’s Day.  The one time male model, who has a last name that sounds like female genitalia (yeah, a lady’s man [...]
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Tom Cruise: Sweating Like His Life has Meaning

Sweaty Tom Cruise, owner of the deepest, darkest closet in human history, is excessive sweating something awful here.  It’s as if there’s a real person inside of Tom Cruise, sweating to get out! Sweating Tom Cruise is proof that there are honest, down-to-Earth people who follow the true values of what America is, still working in [...]
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Excessive Sweating Criminal: Jude Law

Oh what a shame Watson!  Being defeated by 3D blue people!  Totally Avat-tarded!  Oh, there you go Watson, excessive sweating all over the damn place, bloody hell! Judy Law excessive sweats like it’s totally in fashion brah, totes! Link or Bookmark to: Hide Sites
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Sweat Stain of Mediocrity: Kate Hudson is the Perspiration Pits

Sweaty Kate Hudson, why do you still exist in media?  We have no idea.  Everything about you is like so blah! You even agree with us that you’re about as exciting as mauve wallpaper.  Sweaty Kate Hudson’s own words about seeing herself on screen: “gets cold… shakes and… sweats” That people still give you roles is amazing, we’ve [...]
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Ashley Jones: Bold and Beautiful Excessive Sweating

Bold and beautiful Ashley Jones just can’t can’t stop here excessive perspiration from ruining her almost perfect red carpet pose.  And it’s weird, because she’s not exactly The Young and the Restless anymore, girfriend’s 33 now (but she’s still hot and sweaty enough to make use feel young and restless!). Armpit sweat disaster Ashley Jones is [...]
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Rihanna Sweating Herself So Hard

Sweaty armpits Robyn Rihanna Fenty, you are every bit a vision of loveliness, talent and perspiration.  You go girl.  You went far girl. And thank god you went far from has been Chris Brown. Get some antiperspirant for that excessive sweating yo, you’re gonna sweat stain that silk! Link or Bookmark to: Hide Sites
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Sweaty Traveling Salesman Tiger Woods Loses His Balls

Sweaty Tiger Woods, you come out of hiding to make a wimpy little statement about your infidelities, and then come out of hiding again and you go and say you’ve quit golf indefinitely…  Got nuts?  Really? You chase literally everything that sweats in your path, standards be damned, and now you’re going away to your Swedish [...]
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Why is This Man Sweating? The Tiger is Out of The Woods!

Boring sweaty Tiger Woods finally gets interesting, but of course not for performing a hole in one, but rather for playing many different sweaty holes at once!  Oh, this is too much sweaty fun!  Who would have thought?  We knew all along…  Really. Just think about it, a man who has no real social passions?  What kind [...]
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Reese Witherspoon Without Antiperspirant!

Oh Laura Jeanne Reese Witherspoon, why have you forsaken us? Why have sinned the armpit stain sin? Good Lord, thou shall not excessive sweat from thine sweaty armpits! Sweaty Reese Witherspoon, we loved you in Election even though we loved hating you in the movie itself! Link or Bookmark to: Hide Sites
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British Turkey, Tony Blair Excessive Sweating Lameness

Excessive sweating Anthony Charles Lynton Blair is an awfully long name for a sweaty douche bag, and a quitter.   Sweaty Tony Blair is famous for a lot of things, but in the last decade, mostly for being frat brothers with logically disabled George W. Bush. Excessively sweaty and slimey Tony Blair was step for step [...]
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Twilight Werewolf Taylor Lautner Steroid Excessive Sweating

Hey brah, you’re totally leaking the sweat fluids dude, chill on the steroid intake. Sweaty Taylor Lautner is seemingly everyone’s favorite button-nose teen werewolf these days, and for good reason, the Twilight Saga: New Moon sweaty star is ripped like a comic book hero.  Totals brah. Gil Birmingham (middle) posted the above excessive perspiration picture on [...]
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Hugh Jackman Macho Sweating

Oh sweaty, grunting macho man Hugh Jackman, you are almost too heterosexual…  You almost have to wonder. However, you were indeed a great sweaty, lunging Wolverine, even though the script and the plot was a little convoluted and predictable and while entertaining, the movie didn’t go beyond the usual sweaty action movie fare. Hey buddy, I know you’re [...]
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Master of Whining, Nineties Ghost Billy Corgan Sweating Like Uncle Fester on Spring Break

Hyperhidrosis much sweaty Uncle Fester?  Nineties icon of teenage pain, Billy Corgan is excessively sweaty during the Hollywood star ceremony.  With James Bond villain looks, sweaty Billy Corgan looks like his songs sound, full of interior agony with a hint of quiet remorse. We have a feeling sweaty Billy Corgan misses the nineties…  We certainly don’t [...]
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Every Man’s Actor, Kevin Costner Sweating a Waterworld Armpits

Every dude, sweaty, Kevin Costner, when he isn’t fighting an ever-expanding forehead, is excessive sweating his path into oblivion.  Ghost of male-driven macho roles of past, sweaty Kevin Costner is now doing what boring rich men do everywhere, mainly, play golf, sweat it up and hangout with their trophy wives. Can you feel the mediocrity?  Peace [...]
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